Is there anything more intimidating than trying to make a good impression on a woman? Whether you’ve been admiring her from afar for months or if you feel it’s love at first sight, it’s a real struggle to put together a plan for getting her to notice you and develop that mutual attraction.
In the beginning, the ball is in your court. You need to come up with some great ideas for gifts and dates to show not just that you like her but that you have strong feelings for her. Here are five ways to get started:
Go A Step Higher
Everybody has done cards, stuffed animals, and flowers. They’re very familiar territory for every woman.
To stand out, you have to elevate beyond the routine items. A bundle of flowers grabbed quickly from a street vendor is sweet, but a beautiful collection of boxed roses from a high-end designer will make a much more meaningful impression.
Some of these options cost more, but it’s not about spending more money. It’s about the thought process, about your desire to get her something really meaningful. Many such gifts will cost less than the tried-and-true. Some may even cost nothing. The point is that you have made the effort to put more thought into it.
Take A Different Approach
If you think that showering her with gifts still isn’t quite your style, there are plenty of other ways to create a spark. Capturing her attention requires that you come up with ideas that are uniquely about her.
Don’t get stuck in a one-size-fits-all approach. If you’re going for the beautiful boxed roses, present them to her on something other than a standard dinner-and-movie date. Drive her to the mountains to take in amazing fall colors. Go for a morning jog on the beach. Just think outside the box and make the date personal.
Women like to discuss their romantic situations. Her close friends can be of great value to you as you try to get noticed. And they can sometimes provide the feedback that she won’t give you herself.
There’s nothing like making plans to take her on a romantic date to an elegant steakhouse, only to find out she’s vegan. Oops. If you had caught a chance to talk with her friends or even just co-workers, you would have saved an awkward moment.
And if you have the chance to see one of her friends after a date or a gift, quiz her. Ask what the reaction was and if she commented on things.
Listen And Remember
One of the biggest pet peeves in relationships is lack of communication. If you’re serious about someone, you need to pay attention to the things she tells you. Typically, it won’t be overt (that comes after you’re married!). But you do need to notice the clues she’s giving you–and then to remember them later on.
For example, you might not have needed her friends to tell you she’s vegan if she’s got a “Meat Is Murder” bumper sticker on her car, her lunch is always a salad, and she volunteers at a community garden. You ought to see those clues.
Other things are more subtle. If she’s gushing about seeing a romantic movie, you’ll know where to start as you plan a date. If she’s sporting a pedometer every day, think about an activity date. You get the idea. Don’t force a standard, stereotypical date on someone who may not be standard or stereotypical.
Keep The Momentum
So let’s say you make that touchdown date. She has a blast, she smiles the whole time, you talk until 1 AM. It’s perfect. Congratulations. You have now raised the bar, and every date will need to be at least that good.
You can’t quit now. Every bit of thought and preparation that went into the first date will now have to go into all your dates. It will be tough, but all the steps leading up to this point can be repeated, to a certain extent, and will keep you going as you continue to cook up ideas for new experiences.
Don’t let this scare you. If things work out and you end up happily married, you’ll have a great base of shared memories to draw from, far better than those of friends who did cookie-cutter dates.
So enjoy the excitement and the uncertainty, and make your best effort to land the woman of your dreams!
Photo courtesy of Press of Atlantic City.